How is this poem.............

Can you say which lines are good and which are bad. And how can I improve ?

The inner fire burns without any flame

Anger, hatred and envy being firewood

Witheld, it gathers in the murky depths

light load grows hidden into heavy burden

fumes creates a most a ferocious monster

Infant fed a foul tasting milk from creator

Beneath stable soil flows red boiling magma

It seeks not but struggles for life given air

The father is devoured from the inside

A great battle and one is killed, suffocated

Chains broken, unbound it breaches the walls

All consumed, remains only a soft skin covering

Curtains are torn apart and terror begins

Calm cloud was father and lightening his son

Strike does fear as furious flames ignite

All reduced to ashes before dragon can die

Then shall the skies clear and heavens open

Ressurected, one lives again and breathes once more, his last

Your Poem is lovely....Ii expresses reality as it is... But it sounds a litlle prosaic...try to use more flowery language and ofcourse try to divide your poem into equal stanzas.

Besides these ur poem is great.

All the poem lines is good, try to wright more poems and publish to web..

All the best

it's too sentimental but if u r a more sensible guy u will success with ur opera.

good

good one but i didn't understand it

it was very very very very very very very very very very good.

keep writting such poems